needing a hug

I have had a lot of back/leg pain in the last few weeks accompanied by pins n needles in my toes and eventually trotted or hobbled into the Gp's surgery.
Seems i have Sciatica and was prescribed painkillers....they may take the pain away from my back etc but they wont touch the pain in my heart.
I so wanted him there with me....for a hug,some reassurance,just to hold hands,to just not feel alone....
I have been feeling very low lately ...mainly when i am in pain or tired or stressed.
I made a pact with myself about no contact and in the main i have kept to it.He txt's me at least once a week claiming it is the network messing about(he addresses them to someone else as if carrying on a conversation with them)and for the most i resist responding but when they become abusive or accusing i do defend myself.I asked him once if he meant to send them to me and he said No and was very aggressive about it, but they still come.
I know people will say change your no.etc but i'm not ready for that yet....dont know if i ever will be

Oh you do need a hug don't you. .....and you shall have them .....(I think he's lying about the messages but you can block his number somehow if you are brave enough.) Meanwhile hug enclosed.
Hope the picture works - but if not you are hugged anyway. It won't take away the pain - I wish I had that picture - but somebody thought of you today - and that does help. Do something nice for you today. Go for a walk, buy something nice, watch favourite programme after work - whatever it takes - you are worth it.

((((((Hugs)))))))for being brave.

Not pleasant to be in physical and emotional pain at the same time. Hope the pain in your back eases with the painkillers. Presription for pain in the heart as follows...

Set up a small network of friends and family who will help and support you. Lean on friends both real and virtual. Would it help to write a blog? If you don't feel that's for you, try writing a journal. Any notebook will do and just write, draw, scribble all thoughts that come into your head. I became so attached to my journal!

You will find support and friendship here. Lean on us we never get tired of listening.

Mitchum xx

I, too am sending you a hug. A massive hug, I wish there was some magic cure to take this pain away, but if we didn't feel it I don't suppose we would be compassionate humans. I know exactly where you are, my x did some very unkind things that has caused me such mental anguish but I still miss him or my dream of him tremendously. But we must listen to our wiki fiends it does get better with time. Do, do something nice for yourself today you deserve it.

That is a very good point Gloria.I think it is our 'dream of them' we miss so much...being part of a couple, a team, in an intimate relationship. Being abandoned like that makes us feel vulnerable and lonely(like being a little child again), and we just want someone to put their arms around us and reassure us that everything will be alright...
The reality is that we are on our own through this and trying to be as strong as we can while finding who we are after being used to compromising for so long...It's a long road, but as others have said it does get easier to deal with...
The Winter weather doesn't help, as it's miserable and cold, reflecting how we feel, but hopeflly our spirits will lift too a bit with the better weather...
It is great to come here to get support from others going through the same feelings as you..It does help to give you a bit of a boost.

Think daffodils! Not as silly as it sounds-just think about their brave, bright colours pushing through the grimness and damp....there you are- a message of hope!