Consent Order Question

Hi all

This might seem a stupid question but . . . can you be forced to take legal advice over a consent order?

My X has sent CO back incomplete & incorrect to the figs agreed at mediation and won’t seek legal advice (so it is not signed by his sols) because it costs (rest was under LA for him).

The CO is with the court but they are going to ask for us both to appear to review the order in the New Year because of the inconsistences. My sols will advise that he attend court with me which will cost an awful lot (Am now offically broke!) .

But what can happen if all was agreed at mediation, & both agreed to take advice but X just hasn’t. – Will the order be thrown out & we have to start again (over 2 yrs now & I have been merrily paying off all debts as agreed) I feel like I am being penalised all over again – when I have tried to be as amicable as possible, agreed to Petition under false incorrect grounds & paid for the consent order & mediation to get this sorted & for what!

Any advice much appreciated – does sols have to go with me? What will happen in court? Will it all have to start again, am feeling guilty re agreement but mostly friends / family are mad at me as they say I’ve been walked all over already – Just don’t know what to do & really hoped it would be all over for Christmas.

Thanks JJ

The solicitor doesn't have to go with you but should probably come off the record if you can't afford for him/her to go. It is most unlikely that the order will be refused, especially if your solicitor thinks that it is a reasonable deal. Your ex can't be forced to go to a solicitor - that's why the court is going to have a hearing.

When my Co went to court the ex and i got a letter to say a DJ had questions and a hearing was listed for 15 minutes, i called my solicitor and asked whats this all about he said i dunno but i can go with you i asked how much he said £600 i said do one, to be fair he did say i didn't need him.

Went to court the ex had no solicitor so it was just me and her, went in with the judge he asked why are you here? turned out he was not the judge who had questioned the order nor had he had time to read it, he asked some dumb questions, my wife was very nervous and just looked at me when the judge spoke to her, to save time i asked if i could respectfully explain the order and the thinking behind it, he listened and took notes, said he was happy with it and i asked he seal it there and then which he did, we were in no more than 6 minutes.

Your order sounds much more problematic, the chances are the judge will make recommendations and not seal the order until they are adopted, you wont have to start again unless your ex refuses to listen to the judge, it should be a case of just amending the order.

Oh dear that sounds like a ******** when you have gone to all this trouble. I was going to use a word connected with your derriere which might have expressed my meaning better, even if a little more crudely !

But you see, the difficulty from the Court's point of view is that a consent order means that there is agreement. If your other half will not sign, that suggests the possibility that there is no real agreement. Unfortunately, this sort of thing can and does happen now and then.

So, the first thing is that the Court is concerned to make sure that

you both understand the agreement ;
that both parties are agreed on the terms ;
that the order accurately reflects the terms of the agreement ;
that the terms of the agreement are within the parameters of fairness and that, for example,
the Court is not dealing with a well resourced spouse using his/her greater resources to railroad a weaker spouse into agreement ;
that both parties have access to independent advice.

I think that - if you are still on speaking terms with your x2b - it might be a good idea to talk it through with him, find out why he will not sign, what if anything it would take to make him sign, and you may be able to get an idea of where the problem lies. Better to do this now, while there is still time, than find out in a judge's chambers.

Your disagreement might be trivial and easily resolved. But there may be no real agreement at all, in which case there may be little choice but to go to a hearing.

And a word of warning - to both of you two good people. Don't go to a hearing if the points involved are trivial. Believe me, it might even be better to concede a point, if you can live with it, than to spend £5000 arguing over £500, if you see what I mean.

I haven't answered your question directly, but I suggest you proceed along the lines indicated. There used to be an old wartime saying, time spent on reconnaisance is seldom, if ever, wasted.

LMM

Thank you all so much

LMM - we went to mediation to agree the consent order, agreed the finances and signed these off. However, although my X has signed the order (himself) he has (for some reason) filled it in with figures that seem to be plucked out of the air & bear no relation to the mediation agreement (or actuals), so none of it matches the mediation agreement.

The consent order is written up using all the details from the mediation agreement & I sent a copy for my sols to send to the court (not sure if he did though).

At mediation we both agreed to take legal advice, & although X has signed the order his sols has not (my sols says because he hasn’t taken advice or help completing the documents) (jcj - no doubt if I had paid for it for him then he would have taken the advice).

I cannot talk to X as he is adamant that "I" am taking him to court over the order. I have explained what has happened but he wont take it as him being wrong - just spouts the mediation agreement at me & its all sorted (why oh why did he not use the correct figs then I don’t know).

Dukey - I don’t want to take my sols to the court (has cost me over £2k already & I am the respondent - mostly for chasing X) at £26 per 6 mins I cannot afford it.

If I go armed with the mediation agreement and updated financials for me - do you think this will be sufficient?

Not something I am looking forward to - on the one hand I have family (ALL) stating I have been walked all over, I wanted to agree for an easy life & so kids saw no more arguing & now after 2 years it goes to all this. Only thing is I always feel sorry for X (God knows why really - use to be Mrs fix before split & I find it hard moving from this now)!

It all seems such a never ending mess & knocks you for 6 on a regular basis.

Thanks again for your help on this
JJ

It sounds as though his D81 figures do not tally with yours, more importantly he signed the order himself, this alone is enough for a judge to call you both in, all the judge will do is make sure he understands the order and its implications for the future.

Your probably looking at a hearing of 15-30 minutes, its not really anything to worry too much about.

Thank you Dukey

Puts my mind at rest a bit - one day it all will get sorted & I have to just wait for that day (patience is not my strong point).

Just weary with it all going back & forth all the time – it seems never ending & it’s only when you get moments of quiet that you have that panic! I just want it all over – so that I can move on.

Thanks again
JJ