Ages.
Me – 50, My wife – 49
Number of children.
4 sons
– 25, + 22 (both left home), 20 (at Uni – will live with me on return), 10
year old will reside with his mother.
Nights spent with
parent
The 20 year old will be 21 in November 2010 but will not finish
Uni till May 2011. He will reside with me all Uni holidays and when he
finishes Uni, he currently comes home at least once a month. He does not
want to spend any time with his mother.
We have not agreed any
arrangements for the 10 year old but I do not envisage him staying with me
anymore than very occasionally, certainly les then 52 days a year.
Length of marriage
Married 29 years, there was no previous
cohabitation
Incomes
I am now in receipt of a final salary
scheme pension of £29,500 after taking voluntary redundancy with an
immediate pension in December 2009.
My wife’s annual salary is
approx £10k per year, plus she receives about £7k a year in rental income
from a 2nd home she bought (mortgage free) nearly 6 years ago. She has been
in receipt of child benefit for 25 years, been working for a number of
years but never paid into a pension.
Outgoings
All direct
debits, standing orders, and standard household bills add up to £1250 per
month, on top of that is food and the cost of running two cars. My wife
also pays 10% of all her net income to her church.
Assets
Family home – approx £285k – joint names on title deeds
2nd home –
approx £200k – wife’s name on title deeds
Wife’s car - £4000
My
car - £750 (we had been looking to change this – its done £210k – my
solicitor advised I could still go ahead as long as I wasn’t stupid – so
this might increase to £7k)
Caravan - £750k
Shares – approx £30k
(some in my name, some in my wife’s name)
Premium bonds - £15k – in my
name
ISA’s – me £2k
My wife £6k
Bank accounts - £10k me
£10k – wife (although some of this (approx £4k) is rental she would
gift back to her father)
I am still awaiting the remainder of my
pension AVC’s to be paid as a lump sum approx £25k
My wife also
bought multiple jewellery collections, only a couple of items are worth a
reasonable amount, the rest were probably less than £100 pounds each. I
have the order details and over a 3 year period she bought £13k of
jewellery from GEMSTV. This auction site claim that most items are at least
half if not three-quarters cheaper than the resale market value, so I don’t
know exactly what this collection might actually be worth.
Household
contents insured for £50k – only significant items :-
Various items
(20ish) of silver – value unknown
3 piece leather suite – purchase
price approx £4000 7 years ago – still looks like new
Bespoke antique
pine and glass bookcase cabinet – purchase price approx £2000 7 years ago –
still looks like new.
Canon SLDR – purchase price approx £1000 – 2
years old
Computer system and printer – purchase price approx £750 – 2
years old
Matching dining room suite and display cabinets – value
unknown approx £500
A significant amount of household items were
removed from the house without my knowledge by my wife, including nearly
all pictures and ornaments, all crystal glass collections, and items
mentioned above ie. cameras, jewellery collections and the family
computer.
Liabilities
£55k mortgage outstanding on the
family home
£2k car loan on wife’s car.
And possibly £250k to my
father-in-law :-
My wife and I separated for 18months about 7 years
ago. He gave her a cash gift of £250k to buy the afore-mentioned 2nd house
on the understanding that he would get some or all of his money back if we
divorced (I was not involved in any of this agreement). He also advised her
that should he die and the money had not been repaid, then that would be my
wife’s share of the inheritance (he is a millionaire). We didn’t divorce
and the value of the house fell so they decided between them to rent the
house out. My wife makes cash gifts of most of the rental income to her
father.
So where do I start.
Two weeks ago
whilst I was away on a seminar my wife packed her possessions and those of
our 10 year old son along with multiple household belongings and left me a
note to say our 30 year long relationship was over and she would be filing
for a divorce. Initial letter form the solicitor has now been received. I
understand that she is now living with friends from her church, and has
given one month’s notice to the current tenant in her 2nd house.
I think my wife is expecting me to sell the family home and all assets
and that she would receive sufficient funds (she was thinking along the
lines of 75% - 25%) to make a cash gift back to her Dad (although in
reality he will tell her to keep her money – because she will need it, and
that she will just have got her inheritance early). I believe she then
expects to receive a significant portion of my income (i.e. my pension that
is in payment) and for that to increase to 50% when she reaches retirement
age. She suggested that if that left me short I could go and get another
job at my age. I have been working 12 hour shifts for the last 30 years and
just felt I needed some time off, before possibly looking at some part-time
or voluntary work.
My concern with some of this that she does
not need to live in a large 3 bedroomed executive town house 10 miles from
where she works and our 10 year old son’s
school, cubs, football and friends etc.,
etc. which would involve more expensive running and commuting costs that I
might be expected to contribute to. There are cheaper and smaller 2
bedroomed houses much closer to our family home (literally 3 minutes walk
from my son’s
school and my wife’s work)
As my
pension is now my income, I would like to be able to retain as much of it
as possible. I understand after such a long marriage we should start at a
50/50 split on assets – which would that include the house she bought with
her father’s cash gift. And a 50/50 split on liabilities which again I
assume includes a cash gift back to her father.
I would like to
think that the family home could be sold and I would give her the entire
equity to purchase a smaller 2 bedroomed house (mortgage fre) closer to her
work and the local
school. She could retain the house in
the neighbouring town, and retain all the rental income from it;
alternatively she could sell it and retain all the equity (mortgage free)
in that as well or pay it back to her father.
I estimate that her
jewellery collection is worth at least £25k which she could keep along with
a 50/50 split of all other liquid assets ie. Shares, bonds and cash.
Is this a reasonable split of funds and assets in order for me to retain
my pension of £29,500 per year. I would obviously expect to have to pay
something towards child care out of this, but I will also have to use my
share of remaining assets as a deposit to buy a small two bedroomed house
for me and my 20 year old son, and 4 my 10 year old son to visit, so I will
be having to take out a mortgage.
Can anyone give me a
guesstimate of whether I am being realistic in this sort of settlement? Am
I doing myself over (I don’t really mind anymore) or am I going to have to
sacrifice even more?
I know it’s very complicated but please can
someone help. I need a realistic strategy before discussing any financial
settlements with
solicitors.
Forum 
England and Wales 
